Move over Franco. Step aside Spanish inquisition (and terrorism, corruption and the ongoing financial crisis). The worst thing to happen in Spain throughout history is the abomination that is ‘fashion’ brand Desigual.

My least favourite thing about living in Spain is having to look at Desigual’s ‘unkind-to-the-human-eye’ clothing every day. This country is now riddled with their hideously bright designs that apparently suggest, ‘I may be 40, but that doesn’t mean I’m too old to dress like a mass-produced fairy on acid.’

My 5-year old students have produced better designs than this – and that’s while sitting on the toilet. And considering Desigual has received one of the worst rankings in terms of sustainability/fair trade on rankabrand.org, I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s an army of five year olds having to make these abominations.

Thanks to Desigual, colourful diarrhea has never cost this much. YOUR CLOTHING HURTS MY EYES AND MY BRAIN.

But hey. At least they’re not Zara.

A picture of a woman modelling a Desigual bag and dress
“This dress accentuates my quirky personality and bad taste.”
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